okay, prepare yourselves, I’m about to get really honest with you all. yesterday, I checked up on how my book is doing on amazon and was blown away by one reader’s severely negative review. it wasn’t just your run of the mill “could have been better” review. it was an all out war against my book, and the author put a lot of time into writing it. either she really really hates it, or she has a ton of time and anger on her hands, but either way it sucked to read. in fact, it hurt so bad to read it that I broke down inside. my heart was aching and racing, and my mind completely went blank. even after feeling terrible though, I’m not about to let the hate get me down.
hate is cruel and comes from a place that most of us don’t understand. it can destroy people, dreams, relationships, and forward progress in the world. when used again and again, hate can eat a person alive. remember that movie back in the early 2000’s called “mean girls”? yeah that movie hit the nail on the head when it comes to hate and being mean. I saw it a lot more in high school than in college and thanks to my naive nature, I assumed that most people grow up and stop being the mean girl when they’re an adult. even more, I definitely expect adult behavior out of people who have kids!! of course, that’s not how things actually go, and yes, an adult with children can sometimes be the “mean girl”.
but even through the tears (I know, I shouldn’t care, but of course I do!! it hurt!), I have to think about who this mean girl is to really understand. from what I can tell, she’s a STEM type girl with a kid herself. she (ironically) goes to the same college that I went to, and she says she reads a lot of books. that’s all I can gather on the surface. looking deeper, and after reading her post a few more times, she’s more. she’s angry and critical, sensitive and hurt from years of being the “uncool” kid at school. she finds every opportunity to critic people so that she can feel better about her own shit. most importantly, she hurts and she bullies. and this sucks for her kid. so, as much it sucks to say, I feel bad for her and even worse for her kid.
so what am I doing now? moving forward. for me, the best thing to do is to talk about all of this openly. it helps the healing and it makes it less impactful. also, it’s AMAZING to read and hear my friends react to it, they’re awesome and I love them. so here I am, talking about the meanest bully I’ve faced with MathIs4Girls. what do you guys think? have you faced bullies before? can we nuke them all please? after posting my ordeal to FB, here’s the advice my amazing friends gave me:
- don’t let it stop, harry potter didn’t get off to a good start, which is good context
- she was probably bad at math (hahahaha!)
- get back up and show them what success is
- being polarizing is a good thing
- nothing is more boring than a bully
- haters gonna hate, shake it off like Tswift
- you haven’t made it if you don’t have haters
- they aren’t worth your thoughts
- don’t read the comments!
- ignore them and keep you head held high!
and in case you missed it, sophie’s latest post on banning haters.