being a working mom, whether you’re doing the 9-5, working from home, or something in between, is TOUGH. guys, I always wanted to be a working mom because I, 1. love working and 2. love kids. what I didn’t quite understand was the sheer amount of work involved in being one. granted, I work at a startup, so the amount of work is potentially higher than a more stable desk job or say, a job that you can’t do at home or at all hours of the night (read: nurses, basketball coach, etc).
in the 4 months that I’ve been back at work, I’ve learned a lot about what it means to be a working mom. here are a few truths that are tried and true from my lessons so far:
1. you will never be “done” with everything. you will never say “ok, now I have nothing to do, maybe I should just hang out and read a magazine”. nope. but you can choose to kick back and attack your to-do list later if you’re so inclined.
2. you will be exhausted. this might just be me, but working all day at the office and then working all morning/evening at home is exhausting. C is sleeping through the night now, but that doesn’t mean she hasn’t her rough nights when a cold hits her, or that I never have to work late hours.
3. if you breastfeed, it will be a continual blessing and a curse – I have missed many meetings because I have to pump. BUT I also treasure the time I get with C when I nurse. it’s a constant commitment that requires a lot of attention and maintenance.
4. black is a great color to wear. if you’re feeling out of shape, wear black. if you have spit up on your shirt, wear black. if you want to look serious and focused, wear black. the color black is your friend, embrace it!
5. you will feel lonely. not because you don’t have friends or support, but mostly because it’s just a really weird thing to have a mini human being and all of your career responsibilities in one. I felt/feel like no one could possibly understand how overwhelmed I was and I missed all the good, carefree days with my mom friends. I’ve also missed my non-kid bearing friends a ton too, it’s hard to find time to see them and that’s a bummer.
but despite all of the above, it is absolutely, 100% worth it to be a working mom if you so choose. a colleague recently reminded me that being a working mom OR a stay at home mom is not permanent. you don’t necessarily have to choose one and then live with it for the rest of your life! you might have to do one or the other because of financial reasons, but things might change in the future. always be working towards something that excites you and makes life more enjoyable. if you don’t like your job, look for a new one and try to make the existing one bearable.
net/net – I have the utmost respect for ALL moms, no matter your situation, because honestly, it’s all hard! the best we can do is love on our babes, find excitement in our work, and be crazy supportive of our women tribes. if we do those things, it will all be ok.